Abuse

I do not desire for my children to live in pain and sorrow.

I feel trapped and I don’t know what to do. I’ve been married for five years and have two young sons. My husband and I were high school sweethearts; we met in our church youth group when we were still in school. We both attend church every week. What nobody knows is that my husband hits me. It happened twice before our first son was born, but he apologized and said he would pray and make sure it never happened again. After our first son was born, though, it started to happen more often, and now it happens every month, sometimes more than once! He always promises it will never happen again, and prays, but nothing is changing! I was taught that divorce is only permissible if there has been adultery, or if one spouse becomes a nonbeliever. That’s not true of either of us! What can I do? Do I have to live this way the rest of my life?

I say to you, my heart is near to breaking. This is not the life I desire for you, my child. I have come so you may live in light, not dwell in darkness. Do not despair. I do not wish for you to live in pain and misery. Your husband has broken his vows to you, he had broken the covenant he shared with you by betraying your trust. I have charged my children to love one another, is this how he shows you love? These people honor me with their lips, but their heart is far from me.

There is no fault should you leave such a situation. I urge you to seek help, my child, to find council and shelter with your sisters and brothers, for yourself and your sons.

Remember this, I do charge you to forgive your husband. When Peter asked me, “Master, how many times can my brother wrong me and I must forgive him? Would seven times be enough?" I replied, “No, not seven times, but seventy times seven.” To hold resentment in your heart will only add to your pain, and grief. In forgiveness, you will find the road to healing. However, I tell you, you need not continue to live in such pain. Leave, protect yourself and your children, and forgive the wrong that has been done to you.